Thursday, April 5, 2018
On the mend.
I've been using the fun 1SE app for the last year-ish- it's so cool to mash together small parts of our days and see a little yearbook video of our family. I'll spare you the clips from January/February- they're still a little hard to watch. But when I put together the clips from March, phew. I could literally see a shift. We're on the mend and it shows! More normal. Better health. Less trauma. I mean, I know that things have leveled off and we are tapering from doctor appointments, but it was really good to see it, too.
I know I've been a bit vague when I talk about Caleb's health on this blog or on Instagram, and that's ok. His bacterial pneumonia (turned whole body infection) was just really really awful and left a couple of permanent side effects. It just feels odd for me go into specifics or details in these general places, when it isn't my story to tell. He'll likely have lifelong impacts from the infection and while he's only a toddler now, he'll be a adult one day and we want to give him a chance to talk about it however he wants. Justin and I have a feeling that, as he gets older, some of these things will end up being funny stories he tells or party tricks to shock people. But overall, we're thankful he's 3 and will hopefully have so few memories of these surgeries or how his little body worked before he got sick. Kids are crazy resilient and, to look at him, you would NEVER know how sick he was just a few weeks ago or that the infection caused some serious damage. And every doctor has agreed on one big thing- it is a real life miracle that he is here and thriving today!
Ok, that got dramatic and I didn't intend for it too. The whole point of this post was to mark the change and shift back to normal around our house! We're seeing less doctors (I quit Caleb's OT/PT this week! One doctor doesn't need to see us again until June!) and Caleb has been back at school for a few weeks. I'm thinking he'll have another minor surgery soon-ish and he has a big-ish appointment next week at the children's hospital, but those are all scheduled and predictable things that seem manageable. Outside of his anxious attachment to me (to be expected) and his feelings of being entitled to endless 'treats and presents' (hey, we've been indulgent lately)- he's pretty much back to his old self. Three weeks straight without surgery or anesthesia is good for a kid!
We're still pretty paranoid about him catching any viruses while his lungs recoup and until we find out what immune system issue is going on, so we're avoiding the germiest places (aka everywhere fun). Which makes waiting for warmer weather feel extra hard- why is it still snowing in Indiana in April?!?! So of course we're counting down the days until we can simply be outside. It honestly feels as if these past three months were just skipped over (because we haven't done a ton of life outside of our little family) so I'm hoping spring doesn't happen and we just go right to summer. Anyone else with me?
But this video. Such a good reminder to me that season change (they really do!), that even the hardest things can have bright spots, and that these little normal days add up to something really sweet!