Thursday, August 6, 2015

Thoughts on baby boy.

 I've got two weeks worth of bumpdates ready to go, but I'm putting them on the back burner today. Instead, let's chat about baby boy number two. I mentioned here that I am thrilled we're having another boy. I really, truly am. I would have for sure gotten excited about a little girl, but my heart seems made to be a boy mom. After our ultrasound a couple weeks ago, Justin and I grabbed a quick breakfast together. As we ate, we dreamed about what our lives will soon look like and how grateful we are to be giving Caleb a brother. 
  This whole pregnancy has seemed like a whirlwind, though. Well, maybe that's not the right word. We talk about baby boy a lot at home, between the two of us. He's moving all the time now, so I stop to feel his kicks throughout the day. But other than that, this pregnancy is so different than my last. I had so many friends pregnant at the same time and it was our first. This go-around sort of seems like old news- on the outside. 
  All of that has made me extra conscious of this little guy's role as younger sibling. I want to make sure I make this pregnancy as special {but different!} than Caleb's. I feel the same about all the preparation and celebration that he's on the way- I want them to exist and be intentional. It's completely normal that people on the outside aren't as excited about our second addition as our first and that's ok! But I'm learning that it's still ok for me to celebrate quietly- I'm finding sweet details for his room and praying for the little guy he'll grow to be and getting excited about how sweet this Christmas will be for him. 
  I don't know. Does this all seem jumbled? The thoughts from this post are still swimming in my head. And in light of them, I think I'm learning about being ok with a quieter life and having less expectations for how things should go or look. 
  All this to say, I really am so excited about this little boy. A healthy ultrasound gave us some space to dream more about who he will be and how our family will be changing soon. Feeling him moving reminds me that its all real and he's the sweetest gift in this season. Even though I probably don't talk about it much to others, those feelings and thoughts are so real and present and I can't wait for December to be here!

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